New Year's Resolutions

I was doing one of my annual rituals: replacing my 2015 wall calendar with the 2016 one.
I noticed the resolutions I jotted down (and never got around to writing them as SMART goals).

I read them and discovered that I achieved 4 out of the 12 resolutions I made one year ago.
Some are on the way to being accomplished in 2016.
Others I changed plans throughout the year.
Some were too vague ("eat more fish").
Others were postponed because life got in the way.

But you know what? I'm not bothered by the ones I didn't achieve.
I used to be a perfectionist, but I've learned to love myself as I am (a big part of that is knowing that I don't have to be perfect in order for God to love me).

Instead, I chose to focus on the resolutions I did achieve.
Some of them had been on my to do list for a long time ("get G drivers licence").
I chose to be proud of myself, and what I have accomplished.

Life is about choices. Being happy is a choice.
Start practising with the small things and you will be able to do it with the big ones - like resolutions.

Quote of the day

Quote of the day: Most Christians spend more time watching TV than they do with the Word of God. It should be the opposite. - Andrew Wommack

Reflections on Remembrance Day

(C) Lynne Kirton

I attended a Remembrance Day service on Sunday.

As they read the name of fallen soldiers from the community, I was surprised and sad. There were so many names! It felt like the list would never end.

I kept thinking of those young soldiers. Did they know what they were getting themselves into? How brave they were! But also probably conflicted (from the movies I've seen it seems there was a conflict between going to war and preserving one's life - a natural human instinct). How hard it must have been for them to make the choice to serve.

What horrors they must have seen. I remembered scenes from shows like Downtown Abbey and Land Girls: bullets hissing, bombs exploding on the ground, dead bodies all around.  How scary that must have been. I also wondered how they dealt with the conflict between defending your country and not taking someone else's life. I know that God forgave them, but how did they forgive themselves? It must be hard.

Then I thought of the mothers and wives. How powerless they must have felt. There was nothing they could do to save the lives of those men. I understood their urge to become nurses, work in bomb factories, and so on.

I felt their grief. The pain and the anger. The anger I've felt so many times when I lost someone close to me. The "why, God, why" feeling. I thought of my own life's purpose and what I've been focusing on in the last 2 years: spirituality, religion, helping churches so that they in turn can help people be happier. What's the point of all this? If in the end we couldn't save those poor men's lives?

I kept trying to think of a theological explanation for that. Why did those men die? Why didn't God save them? I know that "Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee." (Isaiah 26:3 KJV) I've been able to overcome a lot of problems in my life by searching for Inner Peace. I've been able to heal a lot of things in my own body by trusting in Him (more on that on another post). But it must be hard to stay focused on peace while you are trying to kill someone else, while bombs are exploding all around you, while dealing with all those conflicting feelings, while trying to forgive oneself. Is that why they died?

I know the devil led us to war (or in secular terms, fear and negativity led us to war). Did those men unknowingly attract the devil (or in new age terms, did they attract negative energy) which increased their chances of death by choosing to go to war?

My current mode of living is to avoid dwelling on negativity (or in Christian terms, avoid thinking about the devil) as much as possible. I imagined God whispering in those soldier's ears, to dock down as a bullet was about to hit them, to take a wider step as they were about to set foot on a mine.  Or an even better thought: God was screaming at them, as loud as He could. Some could hear His voice (as an Intuition) and others couldn't. Is that why some of them died? That is the only theological explanation I can find that fits with my "God is 100% good" philosophy.

As I muddled through these feelings, of grief, fear, conflict, I thought of the comfort that focusing on God's love has given me throughout the past 2 years. I realised that I might not be sure as to why so many men died, but I do know that He was always there to comfort us. I imagined God comforting a soldier as he tried to forgive himself for killing another human being. I imagined God comforting a mother as she dealt with the loss of her son.

As we stood up and sang "O' Canada", I felt a strong sense of community and belonging. And then, the verse "we stand en garde for thee" finally came alive in me. Those soldiers stood en garde for Canada, for our Sovereign, for our freedoms. That verse is in the anthem because of them. From now on I will think of them when I sing it.

After the service, I had the pleasure of hearing the stories of Major Alan Haywood. I intentionally went up to him and asked him to share his stories with me. I'm a good listener and I love being there for people. So I thought that was the best way for me to honour a veteran and truly be a part of Remembrance Day. He made history come to life for me and I helped him keep the memory alive.

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: Consistent Faith is the key to happiness

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: The more you practice focusing on the positive, the easier it gets. Just keep on practising.

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: the best way to get through tough times is to maintain a steady focus on the positive.

Feel Excited!

I heard this tip from Joyce Meyer a few weeks ago: you should wake up every day feeling excited and thankful for what God will do to you and through you today. 

(see this video on 16:12 for the complete teaching)

For the last few weeks I have tried to do that.

I never felt super excited, I felt more like happy. But I always tried to do the exercise. And every day, a small but nice thing would happen to me.

Yesterday, I was thinking about how ugly the outside was (while in the subway) when we passed through a patch of grass full of flowers. It was as if God had listened to me and said "look, it's not that ugly". I felt like He had put those flowers there just for me.

Then today, I woke up feeling super excited. I feel/know that something amazing will happen in my life. It's something big that will make me very happy and will change my life forever.

The level of excitement that I feel right now is much bigger than what I've felt throughout these past weeks of doing the exercise.

I believe a big part of what I feel today is because I have been training my "emotional muscle" for weeks to feel excited every day. It's the famous American saying "fake it till you make it". I've noticed many times that the saying works.

I am so excited that I have no doubts that this amazing change will happen in my life. That is how powerful my faith has become (probably because of me doing the exercise every day for weeks).

My suggestion for you? Follow Joyce's advice and do the exercise daily.

Fill your 'what if' pies with positive possibilities

Have you ever worried about the future by thinking "what if..."?

When most people do that, they are thinking about negative possibilities: "what if I lose my job?", "what if she gets angry at me?", "what if I get hurt?", etc.

After coming up with the negative possibility, they start imagining a sequence of negative events: "if I lose my job, I will have to use my retirement savings, then I won't have any money when I retire, so I will have to live on the streets" (you get the idea). 

Or they spend time trying to control their lives in order to avoid the negative possibility. In our example, the person would do everything they can to keep the boss happy, even if it means treating their colleagues unfairly, going behind their backs, etc.

Can you see how destructive it can be to focus on negative possibilities?

The 'what if' pie

Imagine your 'what if's are like pies that you cook and eat yourself. When you spend time imagining what could happen, it's as if you were making a pie: you come up with a negative possibility (mix the ingredients) and then you start thinking about the ramifications (baking). When you eat that pie, the digestion will consume your body's energy, just like worrying consumes your mental and emotional energy.

But it doesn't have to be that way. If you change just one part of the recipe, your life can be much better. You might be asking "what part? what can I change?" The answer is: fill your 'what if' pies with positive possibilities, instead of negative ones.

Positive possibilities

I have said before that we should have hope that the future will be good. Instead of spending our time and emotional energy with worrying, we should spend it on hope.

"But how do I do that, you may ask?" You can do that by changing the content of the words in your 'what if's. Instead of wondering about negative outcomes, start wondering about positive ones.

For example:

Let's say your spouse has been offered a job in a different city, and you are worried about the change it will bring in your lives.

Instead of wondering:

• "what if there are no good schools there for my kids?"
• "what if I can't find a good job?"
• "what if I can't make new friends?"

Change your 'what if's to positive ones:

• "what if I find a great school for my kids, and they make lots of friends, discover hidden talents and get admitted to an excellent university?",
• "what if I find a great job, where I am well paid and have fun with my colleagues?"
• "what if I get promoted in that job because they value my skills?"
• "what if I find clubs and other opportunities to meet people?"
• "what if I'm pleasantly surprised by the number of people who share my interests?"
• "what if I discover new interests and make friends while practicing those activities?"

The unknown is full of possibilities. You can imagine anything you want for your future. The only limit to your imagination is yourself. 

It might be hard at first to remove some of the limits you have been placing on yourself. That is ok. Start by taking just one step beyond the limit. For example: if you think people in general don't like you and never want to be your friend, imagine that you will meet just one person who will be nice to you and help you with something. Then hang on to that positive possibility. Keep thinking about that scenario, instead of thinking about all the other people who might not be kind to you. Just keep focusing on the positive possibility.

You can do it!

I have done that kind of imagination and it has helped me greatly in focusing on the positive. As I have mentioned before, when you imagine that your future will be good, you become a happier person. Being happy (ie, having inner peace) makes it easier for you to cope with problems.

Another positive result of changing your 'what if's is that you will be searching for those positive situations. If you move to the new city and dread not making any friends, you will likely avoid socializing (because you are afraid of the outcome). But if you move to the city expecting to make new friends, you will start joining clubs and searching for people who share your interests. You are much more likely to be successful on the second scenario.

In conclusion:  Fill your 'what if' pies with positive possibilities and you are more likely to live a happy, successful life.

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: you are much more powerful than you think.

Where is the line?

Can you love this world, with all its imperfections?
Can you love this planet with all its problems?
Can you love all the crazy, sick, misguided people?
Can you love this world with all its dangers and hostilities?

Choosing to focus on the positive means we don't like the negative.
But aren't we also avoiding seeing and thinking about the negative?

Can we accept this world as it is, even with its problems?
Can we be at peace with the fact that there will be cloudy days, ugly cities and evil people?
Or will we always live in avoidance, denial of the negative?
Where is the line between not focusing on the negative and accepting its existence?

Why You Should Believe in a Good Future

Image: Fresco by Fra Angelico. Source: wikipedia.

When you think about your future, do you see things working out in your favour? Do you see yourself happy, successful and your dreams being fulfilled? Or do you automatically expect that life will be tough, you will struggle, and maybe - just maybe - if you are lucky you might have something good happen to you?
If you are the second type (or maybe you're just curious), read on to see why I believe you should always expect a good future.

The Christian Teaching

  
I was visiting Cleveland, Ohio last month, and attended the Easter service at the Church of the Saviour. The sermon was given by Dr. Charles D. Yoost. Even though he has a fearful preaching style, I was able to get something very positive out of his sermon.

He was saying that, in Easter morning the 2 Marys decided go to the tomb (where Jesus had been taken after his death on the cross) to perform some customary rituals on His dead body. And as they walked, they wondered "who will roll the stone away from the entrance of the tomb?" But when they got there, they found that the stone had already been rolled out (Mark 16:1-4). Dr. Yoost used that passage to demonstrate the principle that God is always one step ahead of us.

He said: if you lost someone you love, God has already placed loving friends amongst you to comfort you. If you lost your job, God has already prepared something better for you and you will find it soon.

I believe Dr. Yoost's point was that you must trust God because He has already found a solution to your problems, He has already prepared your healing, He has already provided the comfort you need, etc.

That reminded me of Andrew Wommack's teaching about "A Place Called 'There'". Andrew talks about 1 Kings 17:2-4, where God tells Elijah to go to the Cherith brook, because He has commanded some ravens to bring food to Elijah over there. Andrew emphasizes that God had commanded the ravens to bring food there (at the brook), not here (where Elijah was at the moment). The point Andrew makes is that if we would just trust God and obey His direction (ie, follow our Intuition) there will be good things waiting for us in the future.

I would go one step further and also look at the verb tense in that passage (verse 4): God says "I have commanded the ravens to feed you there". He didn't say "go there and then I will command the ravens". That means God had already orchestrated the provision of food in Elija's future. 
Therefore, I interpret that passage as saying: trust in God, because He has already prepared something good for you in the future.

Andrew mentions another passage (1 Kings 17:8-9), where God again tells Elijah to go to a specific place, because there will be something good waiting for him there: “And the word of the LORD came unto him, saying, Arise, get thee to Zarephath, which belongeth to Zidon, and dwell there: behold, I have commanded a widow woman there to sustain thee”. Once again, notice the verb tense: I have commanded. God had already commanded the woman to help Elijah. The provision was already there.

Back to the passage mentioned in Dr Yoost's sermon, I see it in a similar light: God commanded the 2 Marys (via the Holy Spirit/Intuition) to go take care of Jesus' body. And before they even got there, He had already used an earthquake and an Angel (Matthew 28:2) to open the tomb. I interpret that as another example of God having already prepared something good in our future.

I'm going to guess that there are at least a few other passages in the Bible that also have a similar message (I don't know the Bible well enough yet to make a firmer, more detailed statement).

What is that teaching telling us?

In non-Christian words, that teaching is saying that we should trust that the future will be good, and it will be.

We see that principle being taught by believers of The Secret/Law of Attraction as well. They advise you to believe and expect that your desires will come true, because whatever you expect is what becomes true.

I am willing to bet that many other religions and spiritual belief systems also teach the same principle: trust that your future will be good, and it will be. 

Why is that teaching important? 

I see 2 reasons:  
1) It gives you peace.
2) You get into a virtuous cycle of positive thinking.

Getting some Peace
If you trust that the future will be good, you will consequently let go of your fears and worries, which will bring you inner peace. When you have inner peace, you are able to cope better with whatever comes your way (whether it is actually good or not).

The Virtuous Cycle of Positive Thinking

When you have inner peace, it's easier to get into a positive mindset and consequently to keep on trusting that the future will be good.

Once you break the inertia of fear/negativity/not expecting a good future, it becomes a virtuous cycle: you trust that your future will be good; that gives you inner peace; your inner peace helps you stay positive and keep trusting that the future will be good.

Of course that trust requires constant feeding/practice, but in my experience, the more you do it, the easier it gets (that's what psychology calls Learned Optimism).

Recommendation

It might be hard for you to believe in this principle just for the sake of believing (even when it is backed up by Scripture or pseudoscience). I think that's why so many people shy away from religion nowadays.

But it makes sense to believe in that principle, from the standpoint of mental health: your emotional life will be better if you believe in it. You will be happier if you believe in a good future. 

Therefore, I recommend following that principle, not because "it's what the Bible says", but because it is a healthy frame of mind to be in.

Quote of the day

Quote of the day: If you hope for something good your whole life and never got it, you'd still be better than if you'd hoped for nothing and got it. Because when you're full of hope, you are happy. - Joyce Meyer

Quote of the Day

Quote of the Day: I'd rather believe for a lot and get half of it, than believe for nothing and get all of it. - Joyce Meyer

Quote of the Day

Quote of the day: Your attitude is yours. Nobody can make you have a good one if you don't want to. And nobody can make you have a bad one if you don't want to. - Joyce Meyer

Lesson of the day

What would happen if, instead of always (or even just sometimes) being afraid of what the future holds, thinking of it as uncertain and with a possible negative outcome, you always expected something good to happen?
What would happen if you always, 100% of the times, expected that the future would be good?
What if you expected that so much that it became a knowledge and not an expectation?
Can you imagine how wonderful, how much better your life would be?

Quote of the day

Quote of the day: regardless of what effort I have to go through (...), the fruit (...) is worth the effort. I have to keep my eye on the fruit, and not on all of the work. - Andrew Wommack

Quote of the day

Quote of the day: [you should] minimize the negative and glorify the positive. - Andrew Wommack

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: When you have a heart full of love and forgiveness, it is much easier to focus on the positive and live in joy and peace.

Lesson of the day

Lesson of the day: sometimes it takes looking back at where you were in the past to realise how much better off you are now.

Feed Your Soul

Image: wikipedia

I hear Joyce Meyer and Andrew Wommack say things like "you have to fill yourself with the word" and "you need to study the bible every day". And I'm sure other Christin preachers and equivalent authorities of other religions say something similar. Their argument is that you need to read the Bible by yourself (and not just listen to their teachings), because when you read it by yourself, you will have your own revelations.

At first that advice bothered me. I would think "are you saying that I will only grow spiritually if I read the bible? That is wrong! What about people from other religions? Plus, I've grown so much without reading it. I've had many revelations on my own".

But then I read Pastor Chris' devotional of July 25. He said "what they [people who are facing difficulties] need is a Word-diet. They have to listen to God's Word (...) until the Word gets rid of their wrong mindset and reprograms them aright for success".

And I realised how much time I spend listening and reading religious teachings, and how I depend on them, how much I yearn for those moments in my daily routine and how much they help me.

So I have concluded that when they say "you should read the Bible", what they mean is that you should take time to study/meditate on religious teachings. Listen to and read people who talk about religion/spirituality, and think about what they are saying and how it applies to you. What can you learn from that? How does that help you?

The basic principle is simple: when you flood your mind with positive ideas and thoughts, you can't help but have faith that God/the Universe is taking care of you and everything will be ok. It is a great way to ward off anger, depression or anxiety.

At some point I also heard Andrew say "you have to saturate yourself with the Word". And he made that exact same point I have just made: when you fill yourself with positive thoughts and words, there is no room for negative and destructive thoughts.

And then as I had a conversation about this with my dad, he mentioned that all those activities (reading and listening to religious teachings) are feeding the soul. Just like we need to feed our body, we also need to feed our soul. When we feed our soul, we find peace. And when we have inner peace, it is easier to receive revelations (which is what Andrew and Joyce want us to have). 

Therefore, when they say "read the Bible" I now hear "feed your soul with positive words".